How To Build A Fort in Your Office

Sucks, doesn’t it?

You know what makes offices, or pretty much any otherwise boring and doomy location way, way awesomer?


A FORT.


But how can I build a fort in my office??  My boss will NEVER approve of installing a cannon, or putting a moat.  Never.
  Fear not, comedivas and comedudes.  An awesome office fort can be achieved with little to no effort on your part.  In fact, we here at Comediva have devised three convenient recipes for fort building success that can be modified to suit any office and any office working comediva or comedude.

Stealth Forts, a.k.a. Forts Your Boss Won’t Notice


For those of you with party pooper bosses who don’t approve of using work hours to construct forts, this fort is guaranteed to give you a few minutes peace without anyone being the wiser.  First, hang your darling cardigan/fierce jacket/delicious feather boa (what, feathers are office appropriate, right??) over the back of your desk chair.  Then gather your laptop/ipod/ipad and casually duck under the desk when no one is looking. 

Pull your now empty chair into place and voila!  You are now “at a meeting” or “gone for the day” and hopefully your coworkers will take the hint and go ask someone else to handle that spreadsheet, blissfully unaware that you are enjoying some uninterrupted Comediva surfing time in your stealth fort.

Supply Closet Forts, a.k.a. Forts Only Your Office Manager Will Notice


Supply Closets are prime fort building locations.  They come pre-stocked with everything you need for awesome art projects (yes, your cubical TOTALLY needs status update signs drawn in glitter pens that read things like, “Jenny is at Lunch” and  “Jenny is Available to Answer Questions, but NOT to do Paperwork” and  “Jenny is PMSing, Those Violating a 20 Foot Parameter WILL be Sporked“).  They often also contain snacks.  In order to convert a supply closet into a Fort, bring several squishy pillows from home, a large flashlight and a suitably heavy wedge for the door.  This way, you can settle yourself into the lap of luxury and only those with the proper password shall be allowed entry.  All others will simply think the office manager has started locking the supply closet again.  Bribes to said office manager are encouraged.


The Conference Table Fort, a.k.a. How You Build a Fort When You’re The Boss


If you’re already the boss lady around your office, that doesn’t mean you have to be left out of the summer fort building season.  Simply prove that you are in fact the best boss ever in the history of time and make building the office fort a team building project.  Conference tables make the best forts EVER, especially when lined with couch cushions and stocked with margaritas. 

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