| Pros | Cons |
| Your very own cooler during those long, summer nights. | Cuddling during wintertime isn’t all that cozy. |
| You only need to buy food for one. | You are food for one. |
| Rigor Mortis: saving money on Viagra! | Hugs might feel a little stiff. |
| No in-laws! | Some nutso vampire monarch might not approve. |
| They will never be too tired to get it on super late. | But you might be. |
| They’ll always be able to find you, no matter where you are, if you’re in trouble. | They’ll always be able to find you, no matter where you are. |
| If you get into a fight, all you have to do is un-invite them from your house and they have to leave. | With permission from the vampire government, or with all of their club earnings, they can buy your place and never have to wait for your invitation. |
| They’re really good at giving hickies. | You need to start investing in band-aids and turtlenecks. |
| They will never become not-hott. | You will. |
| No pregnancy scares. | All sorts of other scares: like them creeping up behind you super fast, or appearing in really unexpected places. |
With the Twilight saga came an obsession with all things romance/vampire-related. But we here at Comediva ask, “Is dating a vampire really all it’s cracked up to be?”
Below are the Pros and Cons of finding yourself an Edward or a Bill or an Eric or, hey, even a Pam or Jessica.
Below are the Pros and Cons of finding yourself an Edward or a Bill or an Eric or, hey, even a Pam or Jessica.
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Vickie Toro
Comediva writer and performer Vickie Toro graduated from USC with degrees in I Don’t Know How to Do Practical Things Like Math and Maybe I Should’ve Listened to My Mother (i.e. Cinema-Television Critical Studies and Narrative Studies). She spends her time thinking about deep things, getting distracted by not-deep things, and then gigglesnorting.
To comfort her, Vickie's dad, a retired colonel with a heart of gold, emails articles about successful shy comedians. To make her feel worse, her mother, a Korean with the heart of an ox, tells her how much money computer scientists like Jon, Vickie’s ex-beard, are making. Then Vickie impersonates her, which isn’t really rebellion because her mother says Vickie owes her a “Jagooah” (Jaguar). In short, Vickie loves everything about comedy: the joy, the laughter, the women, etc. But, just in case, she’s trying to find a way to make Jane Lynch her suga-mama.
Oh yeah, Vickie's also the star of Comediva's web series, "Mommy Says."
To comfort her, Vickie's dad, a retired colonel with a heart of gold, emails articles about successful shy comedians. To make her feel worse, her mother, a Korean with the heart of an ox, tells her how much money computer scientists like Jon, Vickie’s ex-beard, are making. Then Vickie impersonates her, which isn’t really rebellion because her mother says Vickie owes her a “Jagooah” (Jaguar). In short, Vickie loves everything about comedy: the joy, the laughter, the women, etc. But, just in case, she’s trying to find a way to make Jane Lynch her suga-mama.
Oh yeah, Vickie's also the star of Comediva's web series, "Mommy Says."
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