The Big Bang Theory popularized Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock, breathing geeky new life into the "classic selection method game" we've all used to solve disputes over the years. Well, hold on to your Vulcan ears! Comediva has taken it a few steps futher and expanded Rock-Paper-Scissors to include hand gestures from all best geeky universes!
Bonus! If you plan to attend Comic-Con, we will be holding improptu Rock-Paper-Scissors-Etc. tournaments all weekend! Start practicing!
1. Game of Thrones: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Dragon-Jon Snow
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock exfoliates dragon. • Dragon char-broils Jon Snow. • Jon Snow gallantly wields scissors. • Scissors distract dragon with shininess. • Dragon incinerates paper. • Paper reveals Jon Snow's parentage. • Jon Snow kicks rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
2. Star Wars: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Rancor-Yoda
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock smashes tiny skull of rancor. • Rancor sh*ts on Yoda. • Yoda Jedi-mind-tricks scissors. ("Cut me not, you will!") • Scissors stab Rancor in toe. • Rancor gets his obese trainer to read paper. • Paper reveals Yoda's inept leadership of the Jedi. • Yoda force-hurls rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
3. Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Vampire-Buffy
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock breaks window, lets in sunlight to vaporize vampire. • Vampire falls in love with Buffy (natch!). • Buffy breaks scissors with her bare hands. • (Wooden) Scissors dust vampire. • Vampire crumples up silly paper. • Paper gives Buffy a really annoying papercut. • Buffy chucks rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
4. Doctor Who: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Dalek-The Doctor
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock dents Dalek. • Dalek rolls over The Doctor's foot. • The Doctor locks scissors up in The Pandorica. • Scissors pierce Dalek's plunger. • Dalek EXTERMINATES paper. • Paper reveals The Doctor's real name. • The Doctor travels forward in time until rock is eroded. • Rock crushes scissors.
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock scuffs Cylon armor. • Cylon pretends to be Starbuck's husband. • Starbuck drunkenly misplaces scissors. • Scissors get stuck in Cylon's hand-cannon. • Cylon ignores technologically-inferior paper. • Paper gives Starbuck a written warning. • Starbuck beans Colonel Tigh with rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock gives Shoggoth multiple black eyes. • Shoggoth attempts power play over Cthulhu. • Cthulhu eats puny human scissors with gusto. • Scissors chop off shoggoth's tentacles. • Shoggoth absorbs paper. • Paper reviews At the Mountains of Madness as "lackluster and unwieldy." • Cthulhu destroys rock with mind. • Rock crushes scissors.
7. Lord of the Rings: Rock-Paper-Scissors-The One Ring-Gollum
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock and mud covers up The One Ring for thousands of years. • The One Ring utterly charms Gollum. • Gollum kills other wannabe ring-bearers with scissors. • Scissors fall in love with The One Ring, too! • The One Ring is folded up in paper. • Paper frightens Gollum. • Gollum crushes tiny birds with rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
8. Comediva: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Unicorn-Comediva
• Scissors cut paper. • Paper covers rock. • Rock gets stuck in Unicorn's hoof. • Unicorn wins Comediva's heart. • Comediva outshines Scissors with razor-sharp wit. • Scissors trim Unicorn's mane. • Unicorn pierces paper. • Paper gift-wraps Comediva. • Comediva makes soup with rock. • Rock crushes scissors.
Comediva.com is a comedy site that showcases original video and editorial content for women. Our mission is to increase the presence of women in comedy and provide a one-stop shop for a girl to get her giggle on.
In other words, we seek COMEDIC WORLD DOMINATION. We’re like Dr. Evil with boobs. Except hot. With nice hair. And allergic to cats. Actually, we just want to take over the comedy world. So please give us 1 million dollars.