The Big Bang Theory popularized Rock-Paper-Scissors-Lizard-Spock, breathing geeky new life into the “classic selection method game” we’ve all used to solve disputes over the years. Well, hold on to your Vulcan ears! Comediva has taken it a few steps futher and expanded Rock-Paper-Scissors to include hand gestures from all best geeky universes!
Bonus! If you plan to attend Comic-Con, we will be holding improptu Rock-Paper-Scissors-Etc. tournaments all weekend! Start practicing!
1. Game of Thrones: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Dragon-Jon Snow
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock exfoliates dragon.
• Dragon char-broils Jon Snow.
• Jon Snow gallantly wields scissors.
• Scissors distract dragon with shininess.
• Dragon incinerates paper.
• Paper reveals Jon Snow’s parentage.
• Jon Snow kicks rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
2. Star Wars: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Rancor-Yoda
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock smashes tiny skull of rancor.
• Rancor sh*ts on Yoda.
• Yoda Jedi-mind-tricks scissors. (“Cut me not, you will!”)
• Scissors stab Rancor in toe.
• Rancor gets his obese trainer to read paper.
• Paper reveals Yoda’s inept leadership of the Jedi.
• Yoda force-hurls rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
3. Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Vampire-Buffy
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock breaks window, lets in sunlight to vaporize vampire.
• Vampire falls in love with Buffy (natch!).
• Buffy breaks scissors with her bare hands.
• (Wooden) Scissors dust vampire.
• Vampire crumples up silly paper.
• Paper gives Buffy a really annoying papercut.
• Buffy chucks rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
4. Doctor Who: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Dalek-The Doctor
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock dents Dalek.
• Dalek rolls over The Doctor’s foot.
• The Doctor locks scissors up in The Pandorica.
• Scissors pierce Dalek’s plunger.
• Dalek EXTERMINATES paper.
• Paper reveals The Doctor’s real name.
• The Doctor travels forward in time until rock is eroded.
• Rock crushes scissors.
5. Battlestar Galactica: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Cylon-Starbuck
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock scuffs Cylon armor.
• Cylon pretends to be Starbuck’s husband.
• Starbuck drunkenly misplaces scissors.
• Scissors get stuck in Cylon’s hand-cannon.
• Cylon ignores technologically-inferior paper.
• Paper gives Starbuck a written warning.
• Starbuck beans Colonel Tigh with rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
6. H.P. Lovecraft: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Shoggoth-Cthulhu
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock gives Shoggoth multiple black eyes.
• Shoggoth attempts power play over Cthulhu.
• Cthulhu eats puny human scissors with gusto.
• Scissors chop off shoggoth’s tentacles.
• Shoggoth absorbs paper.
• Paper reviews At the Mountains of Madness as “lackluster and unwieldy.”
• Cthulhu destroys rock with mind.
• Rock crushes scissors.
7. Lord of the Rings: Rock-Paper-Scissors-The One Ring-Gollum
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock and mud covers up The One Ring for thousands of years.
• The One Ring utterly charms Gollum.
• Gollum kills other wannabe ring-bearers with scissors.
• Scissors fall in love with The One Ring, too!
• The One Ring is folded up in paper.
• Paper frightens Gollum.
• Gollum crushes tiny birds with rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
8. Comediva: Rock-Paper-Scissors-Unicorn-Comediva
• Scissors cut paper.
• Paper covers rock.
• Rock gets stuck in Unicorn’s hoof.
• Unicorn wins Comediva’s heart.
• Comediva outshines Scissors with razor-sharp wit.
• Scissors trim Unicorn’s mane.
• Unicorn pierces paper.
• Paper gift-wraps Comediva.
• Comediva makes soup with rock.
• Rock crushes scissors.
