Why Emma Stone Makes the Best Superhero Girlfriend

Thankfully, in recent years one surefire truth has surfaced: Emma Stone can do no wrong. And her turn as Gwen Stacy — Peter Parker’s actual first love interest in the comic books — is among some of the very best in superhero girlfriends, and girlfriends in general.

So what it is it about Stone that makes her such an ideal, nerdgasmic life partner?

Here’s the breakdown:

The Ability to Be So Unabashedly Dorky, Her Love Interest Follows Suit

Aren’t we all just after that Special Someone who doesn’t mind our penchants for making goofy derp faces on the regular, or going on crazy, nerve-wracked, nerdy rants, or constantly making obscure movie references? For a masked avenger with a double-life, this is an asset: when they finally get the chance to remove said mask, all they need is for someone to let them be themselves, completely.

The Ability to Ignite Warm & Fuzzies With Just a Pouty Face

Emma Stone’s pouty/compassion face knows no equal. Those big, warm, blue eyes, the genuine frown… the sweet freckles… the long, blonde hair… mmmmm

Uhhhhhh

But yes. Point being, whenever your hero/heroine returns from a long night of fighting, scar-ridden (emotionally and physically), all it takes is one look from those sad Stone peepers for your heart and mind to be filled with happy puppies and laughing babies.

The Ability to Make the Hardest Truths / Most Awkward Revelations Not So Bad

Like those with laser-beam-eyes, Stone’s raspy, sexy, deepish voice seems to come out of nowhere — as though it doesn’t belong to her — and cut straight through your soul in a flash. Seriously. She could come up to me and say something like, “Vickie, your family schnauzer, Wheezy, just had a heart attack,” and the only reply I’d be able to come up with would be, “Oh. What? Huh? Cuddle time?”

The Inability to Be the Damsel In Distress

Emma Stone doesn’t wait; she’s a proactive, ass-kicking lady who can do what it takes when the occasion calls. Sure, she doesn’t don a mask or a super tight, low-cut unitard, or impersonate a feline; nah, instead she just grabs a lab-coat and rushes into danger.

She’s a Life-Improver. She Improves People’s Lives.

Sometimes when I’m feeling low, I just imagine getting a hug from her. And even in my mind it feels like all the things sparkly, unicorn-trailing rainbows are made of.