Wednesday, June 27, 2012 
Created by Kristen Bobst
Would You Rather Bang Sherlock or Moriarty?
Because smart is the new sexy.
Created by Kristen Bobst 
Fans worldwide are enamored with BBC's [relatively new] hit show Sherlock. It's become quite the phenomenon, reaching furthur than your average Doctor Who-quoting, Downton Abbey-craving, Earl Grey-huffing anglophile.
But why is the show so successful? Could it be the stellar writing? Or the Arthur Conan Doyle summer-reading nostalgia factor? Nope. What, then, you say? Well, it's elementary. Sex. Sticky, hot, sweaty, British sex. Yes, BBC's Sherlock is so wildly popular because of all the smokin' hot bods on the show.
Sure, on the surface all you might see are pale Europeans with ho-hum looks, some of whom slightly resemble the common otter. But when you listen to these sex gods speak complicated dialogue in English-y accents, you realize that you're getting hot and bothered under your collector's edition Monty Python blanket. It's because smart is the new sexy.
Let's take a closer look at our fine, libido-stroking Sherlockian specimens and rank them in order of f*ckability.
7. Andrew Scott (Jim Moriarty)
This little Irish morsel makes us want to take a big gulp of frothy Guinness just to cool down. His portrayal of genius villain Moriarty could almost turn us to the dark side...in bed.
6. Rupert Graves (Lestrade)
So you like 'em a tad more experienced, eh? That's ok. We've got the silver fox for you. Lestrade is a police official (power is hot) who isn't afraid to ask for help from Sherlock (he's got his ego in check). Don't you wanna call out "RUUUUUPERT" in the bedroom tonight?
5. Loo Brealey (Molly Hooper)
A hot ginger forensic pathologist? What could be more titillating? We want this soft-spoken minx to pitifully obsess over us, too.
4. Mark Gatiss (Mycroft Holmes)
Mycroft is ohh sooo naughty. It's ok that he's a bit older. With a bit of a receding hairline. He's a bit dangerous, too! Plus, Mark Gatiss earns extra whet points for being one of the show's creators and writers. They sure do grow 'em hot in BBC-land.
3. Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock Holmes)
Benedict Cumberbatch is quickly displacing Ryan Gosling as the new 'It Boy.' It's no surprise, however. Has Ryan Gosling ever solved any murders while being adorably OCD? OCD is the new hot abs.
2. Lara Pulver (Irene Adler)
A Mensa-smart dominatrix? Say no more. Whip us, Irene Adler. Whip us with your wit (and your actual whip).
1. Martin Freeman (John Watson)
We can't take our eyes off of the disarmingly huggable Martin Freeman. He's the whole package. Not only is he Dr. Watson, he'll also soon be Bilbo Baggins. So, you know that Martin Freeman knows a thing or two in the sack. He's been there and back again, after all! Sigh, where is the Lord of the Rings-Sherlock crossover porn when you need it?
Which of these hotties would you let study your pink? Scandalize your Belgravia? Hound your Baskerville?
But why is the show so successful? Could it be the stellar writing? Or the Arthur Conan Doyle summer-reading nostalgia factor? Nope. What, then, you say? Well, it's elementary. Sex. Sticky, hot, sweaty, British sex. Yes, BBC's Sherlock is so wildly popular because of all the smokin' hot bods on the show.
Sure, on the surface all you might see are pale Europeans with ho-hum looks, some of whom slightly resemble the common otter. But when you listen to these sex gods speak complicated dialogue in English-y accents, you realize that you're getting hot and bothered under your collector's edition Monty Python blanket. It's because smart is the new sexy.
Let's take a closer look at our fine, libido-stroking Sherlockian specimens and rank them in order of f*ckability.
7. Andrew Scott (Jim Moriarty)
This little Irish morsel makes us want to take a big gulp of frothy Guinness just to cool down. His portrayal of genius villain Moriarty could almost turn us to the dark side...in bed.
6. Rupert Graves (Lestrade)
So you like 'em a tad more experienced, eh? That's ok. We've got the silver fox for you. Lestrade is a police official (power is hot) who isn't afraid to ask for help from Sherlock (he's got his ego in check). Don't you wanna call out "RUUUUUPERT" in the bedroom tonight?
5. Loo Brealey (Molly Hooper)
A hot ginger forensic pathologist? What could be more titillating? We want this soft-spoken minx to pitifully obsess over us, too.
4. Mark Gatiss (Mycroft Holmes)
Mycroft is ohh sooo naughty. It's ok that he's a bit older. With a bit of a receding hairline. He's a bit dangerous, too! Plus, Mark Gatiss earns extra whet points for being one of the show's creators and writers. They sure do grow 'em hot in BBC-land.
3. Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock Holmes)
Benedict Cumberbatch is quickly displacing Ryan Gosling as the new 'It Boy.' It's no surprise, however. Has Ryan Gosling ever solved any murders while being adorably OCD? OCD is the new hot abs.
2. Lara Pulver (Irene Adler)
A Mensa-smart dominatrix? Say no more. Whip us, Irene Adler. Whip us with your wit (and your actual whip).
1. Martin Freeman (John Watson)
We can't take our eyes off of the disarmingly huggable Martin Freeman. He's the whole package. Not only is he Dr. Watson, he'll also soon be Bilbo Baggins. So, you know that Martin Freeman knows a thing or two in the sack. He's been there and back again, after all! Sigh, where is the Lord of the Rings-Sherlock crossover porn when you need it?
Which of these hotties would you let study your pink? Scandalize your Belgravia? Hound your Baskerville?
Tagged under
Latest from Kristen Bobst
![5 Other Pixar Sequels That Are [Probably] in the Works](http://www.comediva.com/media/k2/items/cache/f8918f6ca04ec2baaa305b5b254ce4f1_XS.jpg)
Share:
Leave a comment
4 comments
- Comment Link
Thursday, June 28, 2012 posted by Dawn I would very much like to be the creamy middle of the Sherlock and Lestrade sandwich. Please. If you could arrange that, I promise to be a VERY good girl.
- Comment Link
Thursday, June 28, 2012 posted by Iv Moriarty. Cause he is Mr.Sex :P And also Andrew is very hot
- Comment Link
Thursday, June 28, 2012 posted by mspolishdonut John Watson, without a shadow of a doubt.
- Comment Link
Wednesday, June 27, 2012 posted by Jenn Who would I? John Watson. Completely and repeatedly.
Be relevant, be respectful, don't spam us, and remember, it's comedy!
Doctor Who Needs a Lesbian +
Doctor Who is getting a new companion this season. Let's hope she's gay! More ≫ Which Cancelled Sci-Fi TV Show Do You Belong On +
Do you belong among vampires, aliens, or space-pirates?
More ≫ Seasonal Hunks of Summer +
Summer brings with it a glorious variety of beefcakes, so grab your binoculars, manwatchers, and dig into the sexier side… More ≫
- 1
- 2
- 3
- 4
› ‹
Do you belong among vampires, aliens, or space-pirates?
Embrace your inner monster. 
Welcome to Alternate Authors. 
May is here!
Your face.
